Sad life...

Recently I've discover a new way to spend my super extra time in life..SLEEP!!Then Janiz also got tell me sleep do help in diet *smirk* One stone two bird..not bad..not bad..

So far..my record is to sleep from 6pm to 1pm the next day..then yesterday I sleep from 2am-3pm..[my dad wake me up de..if not duno what time will wake..keke]but hor..I found out few disadvantages bout this plan la...

1st:Yesterday I wake up 3pm and till 2am in the night..My eyes were still big and sparkling..Energytic..Thought can play game de..Sigh..dont want to mention bout that again..later my tears will flow down...In the end I force myself to sleep..I struggled on my bed since 11pm..OMG..This is killing me..I on the radio..Fly fm..one song dont know repeat how many times in few hours...Sienz..If I'm not wrong..I only get into sleep round 3.30am..Sigh

2nd:Everytime I wake up late..Others will finish all foods available..No matter breakfast or lunch..[no wonder la..people say sleep can diet..cuz you lost your chance to eat.. =.=''']Then my breakfast for this morning = 1 piece of pancake left... T.T I can say to be lucky this time cuz at least there's some food left...Last friday I woke round 7pm after having nap..The kitchen is empty..That time my parents were out for dinner..thought they'll ta bao for me..[still purposely call them to remind..was starving that time]..Manatau they come back and tell me that the noodless stall dint open..ask me go that malay stall near my house buy myself..Then I really bo song dy..They got food to eat how come dont have place to ta bao?After that I ate the chee choeng fun in my house which they bought since morning..Haiz..Then, my bro go ta bao also never buy for me!![sleep la sleep..now eat urself lor..padan muka..]

In a nutshell..I dont think my sleep plan is working as well...but if I dont sleep..I'll play the role as a house maid..Still remember vividly..Last time..Everyone was at home..Then my dad call me and asked:"Why you never fold the clothes ar?"Holy ****..So many people at house..Why all me me me???Buy food never buy for me..go shopping also never bring me..Now deleted away my game le still me??! WTF...Fine..Who ask me to be born as gal..If son also wont life that kind of torturing life...I know that cuz I got kor kor..but born as a gal not my fault also ma ..T_T

Forget bout it la..A boy flowing the same blood with me studying in Taylor..and yet they forced me to apply what what what IPTA?metrix?yayasan?I sent so so many applications till they also blur which one is which one..Still tell me what his result not good..cannot apply gov de..Then I also get sux result lor..can?Result good only makes you all happy for saving $$,proud to be my parents..but do they ever think bout my feelings?Yea..I may seems happy too..That's just an appearance k?Dont be too innocent la...Actually since the day they ask me to study hard for gov scholarship..I really feeling like to give up everything I got that time..Why I need to suffer so hard studying those days?I suffer from last time till today..Any point for a good result?In the end I'm still suffering >.<

Then..I even realised that..I get the worst treat in this family..When my bro and sis done all wrong things..I'll get the blame..Cuz of them..I cant play game anymore..then nevermind..Still need to be their teacher, driver, and even maid..sometimes still talk to me with rude way[I mean mostly]..no manners..I wonder how their parents teach them?Hehe..dont know..ask my mum and dad la..Even when I get bullied by them..its still my fault..Whenever I complaint to my mum..she'll tell me that I dont have the model as an elder...I never try to earn their respect and etc..So lastly its still my fault..Now..I'll never complaint anything to them..Otherwise I'll get the blame again..*sob sob* Bout my dad..he never give any respond to me..Wooden block!

Haih..This song is best to describe my mood now..

Sorry..Blame it on me.. [Akon]
As life goes on I’m starting to learn more and more about responsibility I realize everything I do is affecting the people around me So I want to take this time out to apologize for things I have done And things that have not occurred yet And the things they don’t want to take responsibility for I’m sorry for the times I left you home I was on the road and you were alone I’m sorry for the times that I had to go I’m sorry for the fact that I did not know That you were sitting home just wishing we Could go back to when it was just you and me I’m sorry for the times I would neglect I’m sorry for the times I disrespect I’m sorry for the wrong things that I’ve done I’m sorry I’m not always there for my sons I’m sorry for the fact that Im not aware That you can’t sleep at night when I am not there Because I am in the streets like everyday Sorry for the things that I did not say Like how you are the best thing in my world And how Im so proud to call you my girl [Bridge] I understand that there are some problems And I am not too blind to know All the pain you kept inside you Even though you might not show If I cant apologize for being wrong Then it’s just a shame on me I’ll be the reason for your pain and you can put the blame on me [Chorus] You can put the blame on me [4x] Said you can put the blame on me [3x] You can put the blame on me Sorry for the things that he put you through And all the times you didn’t know what to do Sorry that you had to go and sell those packs Just trying to stay busy till you heard from Dad And you would rather be home with all your kids As one big family with love and bliss And even though Pops treated us like kings He got a second wife and you didn’t agree He got up and left you there all alone I’m sorry that you had to do it on your own I’m sorry that I went and added to your grief I’m sorry that your son was once a thief I’m sorry that I grew up way too fast I wish I would’ve listened and not be so bad I’m sorry your life turned out this way I’m sorry that the FEDS came and took me away [Bridge] I’m sorry that it took so long to see They were dead wrong trying to put it on me I’m sorry that it took so long to speak But I was on tour with Gwen Stefani I’m sorry for the hand that she was dealt For the embarrassment that she felt Just a little young girl trying to have fun Her daddy should never let her out that young I’m sorry for Club Zen getting shut down I hope they manage better next time around How was I to know she was underage In a 21 and older club they say Why doesn’t anybody wanna take blame Verizon backed out disgracing my name I’m just a singer trying to entertain Because I love my fans I’ll take that blame Even though the blame’s on you [3x] I’ll take that blame from you And you can put that blame on me [2x] You can put that blame on me And you can put that blame on me